Another Firework display on Hawaii leaves 10 dead

As if to show that the national holiday is set to become an annual event, another large explosion has been reported from the SHADO launch facility near Honolulu. The one stage rocket carrying an orbital satellite exploded on the launch pad killing 10 technicians on the ground. An initial investigation has shown that this rocket suffered a similar failure to that of GOSsiP's launch last year, but the near total destruction of the rocket and the launch site has meant that firm details on the cause of the problem is proving difficult to ascertain.¹

Sabotage ruled out at SARSA

Despite the ruling out of sabotage as the cause of the failure of the suspected South African spy satellite, Johannesburg has imposed a significant budget cut to SARSA before approving the transfer of funds to the agency. On the 20^th of December, a launch from SARSA failed when the rocket carrying the government satellite exploded at a height of 15,000 feet. The initial countdown proceeded normally and the explosion was the first (and last) sign of trouble with the mission. Fortunately the rocket's height at the time of the explosion avoided any ground casualties and so the safety rating of SARSA's one stage rocket remains unchanged at 85%.

Suspected surveillance operations

After unexpected progress at SARSA in their interplanetary satellite program many agencies, including at GOSsiP, have blamed loose talk². GOSsiP also suspect that some of the data on their one stage rocket program may have helped SARSA's three stage rocket program, although GOSsiP's scientists did express surprise that a program whose main achievement to date has been a large crater could possibly help anybody's program!

Meanwhile attempts in Australia to close the many bars and pubs surrounding the Woomera launch facility following the discovery of a major leak in the three person capsule program has met with outright rejection by the staff at the facility. Smaug Inc. is suspected of using espionage to raise the safety factor of their three person capsule to match that of ASA's similar program.³

Dr. Venus' bug discovery

The discovery of a nest of a venomous spiders infesting the newly installed electronics in ASA's three person capsule has important safety implications for the future say independent experts. Dr. Venus was in charge of rechecking the capsule for safety and cleaniness following a recent ground test of the capsule. Her discovery of a colony of funnel-web spiders hiding in the clothing lockers of her male colleague's lockers has led to both a major review of the capsule's safety features and to her induction into ASA's astronaut program. It is expected that she has averted at least one major capsule problem that might have occurred in flight⁴.

Spam in a can furore

The description by Einar Gerhardsen, prime minister of Norway, of Maja Hansen as Spam in a can, just waiting to be cooked. has caused outrage at the agency, and a general reluctance to apply for further positions as astronauts at the agency. While the agency admitted that part of the crater at Julianehåb was now used for Summer Solstice barbecues, it said that it has yet to kill any astronauts and it did not recognise the situation described by the prime minister.⁵

Big science push at SHADO

SHADO has embarked a major mission to promote science and provide additional education into mathematics and probability theory. Although the results have not yet been reflected in successful launches, it is expected that this push will be reflected in research conducted by the agency during 1960⁶.

Calls for review of R&D at GOSsiP

After the very slow progress on the revamp of the two stage rocket program at GOSsiP (now rated with a safety factor of just 36% after some concerted research efforts), many at the agency are calling for a review of the research methods used and have threatened the research team with a whole scale review of the program⁷

Lift off is a dangerous venture

Since the beginning of the space race, attempting to get anything off the ground has proven to be a dangerous business. So far, of the five launches attempted, three have exploded on the launch pad, one shortly after launch and only one has so far made into space and into orbit. Observers note that lift off from the launch pad is one of the most dangerous parts of any space mission, with the theoretical re-entry stage of a capsule also being described as quite risky if anything goes wrong.

Launch Calendar

The provisional calendar for launches planned in 1960 (assuming none of the missions are rushed or scrubbed) is as follows:

10^th Oct

Launch by GOSsiP ⁸

15^th Dec

Manned Launch of at least two crew members by ASA as ordered by the Australian Government in 1955

20^th Dec

Launch by Smaug Inc.

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Last updated: December 21, 2021 at 19:38 pm

31 May 2017

Updated to reflect launch window of GOSsiP's planned mission

27 July 2017

Clarified footnote 4

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