The Chronicle

of the month of Lorinfall in the year 142

A major meeting of the City's crimelords was disrupted by the Witanmoot Guard, who it is thought came within a few minutes of capturing the Toddman. The guards, who were in the catacombs beneath Faringdon investigating the disappearance of some Masons, stumbled upon the gathering and with swift action captured a number of the criminal scum. Alderman Rimon of Faringdon told the Chronicle, " The audacity of these criminal elements in choosing to hold a meeting within the city, shows that we are failing in our fight against crime. I implore the sheriffs to impose the death sentence upon those captured, in order to set an example to others that crime does not pay." The Chronicle would like to offer its condolences to the relatives of Henry Beecham, Colin Watson, Sandra Coombes and Cory Kale of the Masons Guild, who the guard later determined had been killed in a rockfall.

There are rumours of scandal within both the Vintners and Carpenters guilds this month, with both guilds launching 'behind the scenes' investigations. Cllr Mowbray, treasurer of the Vintners, told the Chronicle, "We were acting on a tip off, which we have determined to be completely unfounded, and I will be having words with the originators." The Carpenter treasurer, Alderman Dixon, is also inspecting the books, and the occurrence of this just weeks after Sir Paston's final public engagement is the cause of much speculation.

Reg Marc's 'Uncle Marcus' brew seems to have had an odd effect on some members of the Witanmoot Guard, who were seen attempting to 'repair a shutter' on an upstairs window of the Empty Barrel. What the guard were actually doing breaking into this popular councillors' pub is unclear and James Isenbard, the Alderman of Welland, has made a formal complaint to the Witanmoot. He told the Chronicle, "I was not aware that the guard were in the ward, and the possibility that a crime may have been committed worries me greatly. It is clear that the guard is getting out of control."

Alderman Dixon has been having a busy time. Not content with the quiet passage of the Trade budget, the demands of the new job and the time-consuming Carpenter's investigation, Dixon has proposed a motion of censure. The motion, seconded by Nicholas Bowden, condemns Cllr Richard Saunders and demands that he retract his statements reported in the Chronicle last month. Sheriff Perignon may not have time to worry about Richard Saunders, following the disintegration of her faction. What caused this sudden rush to defect from the most powerful grouping in the Witanmoot is unclear, but as far as the Chronicle can gather nearly 50 councillors have abandoned her faction this month. One councillor reported that the faction was disintegrating so fast that people were being hit by the shrapnel. To further complicate matters, Ann Tasker has marked the anniversary of the disappearance of Armundus Septer with a renewal of her campaign to have the matter investigated. She told the Chronicle, "Armundus has now been missing for a year, and we are no further towards discovering what actually happened. Last month the 'Levestone Mafia' again showed its true face and I and the rest of my group will be continuing our campaign to expose their abuses of power."

Seasoned readers of the Chronicle may remember an incident a few years ago when a fire at a dockland pub managed to inflict a number of sword wounds. It would appear that this damage is contagious, since a number of the Witanmoot Guard have sustained serious slashes and burn injuries in a catacomb 'rockfall' a few days after their successful raid on the crimelords meeting. Rumour has it that the crimelords successfully ambushed the guards as they continued their search, and an embarrassed Witanmoot has concocted the rockfall story to cover it up.